Dragon Teacher

I tried a new workout video today (i.e.: I threw my body in different directions across the living room floor, and tried not to fall over the furniture). At one point during the video the instructor yelled, “Dragon Push-ups!!” as he dropped to the floor and grinned the kind of evil grin that made me wonder if he eats the weakest members of his class.

I’m sure in a few days I’ll appreciate just how good this workout was. Right now though, I can’t actually lift my arms more than a few inches away from my body. I’ve just spent the past five minutes trying to toss food and water in the general direction of my mouth. A sight the kids are both delighted and slightly traumatized by.

The Weaker Sweat

I tried a new plyometric workout video today. In hindsight, had I known what plyometrics was before I started, I may have chosen a different video. When we got to the Burpee Tuck Jumps, the instructor said, “Look down on the floor between your legs. Do you see sweat there?! That, my friends, is weakness leaving your body!!”

Nope.

That, my friends, is drool and snot. Drool. And. Snot.